I Went to Bed Alone
I went to bed alone. Something I thought I'd love. No elbow in my back. Or knee in my side. Or hand tickling my armpit. Or drool on my shoulder.
One night, a few weeks ago, Thomas took the kids to bed. Abbie usually stays behind while the boys go to Lincoln's room, but this time Abbie joined them. And then it was just me. Alone. In the bed. I thought I'd love it but it was awful! I was suddenly so alone. Something I haven't felt in a very long time. Even little dude in the womb was still. And there was a deafening silence.
I fell asleep so quickly, so the feeling didn't last very long. And that part was nice!
When Thomas came back with empty arms it was so bizarre. I can't even remember the last time it was just me and Thomas alone in our bed. Probably the night my water broke with Lincoln! 🤣😜🤷♀️
I was relieved to see Abbie wander back to our room a few hours later. Barely two, in her own bed, across the house. I'm just glad she found her way back in the dark! I hadn't prepped anything like night lights in the hallways, but maybe that will be our next move.
I'm still not sure how the transition from 2 extra bed buddies to 3 will go, but I'm fully prepared for them to end up with us. But littlest dude will have his own nest safely beside the bed. I'm sure the siblings will want to smother him with love all day and night and I'm sure snuggles while they sleep would be part of that! 😳😅
These last few months have been such a strange transition for me. I'm soaking up my kids more than usual. Maybe they're changing. Maybe I'm changing. Or maybe it's the reality of this new chapter sinking in.
Lincoln is hilarious. He will run into the dark living room saying "I AM BRAVE!". He'll describe why and how something works. I often correct him, but sometimes it's fun to just listen to his little mind at work. "Mom, did you know..." And I usually don't! We ask Google a lot. 🤣 He's reading and writing and surprises me daily with little facts and tidbits and words I didn't know he knew. He pointed out the Taj Mahal and my jaw dropped. I'd like to think I could point it out, but I'm not sure! 🙈
Abbie Rae is such a spunky little thing. She's so sassy and bossy. I wonder where she got that! 😏😜 She's exploding with words and repeats everything we say. She's forming long sentences and life is so much easier when we know what she wants! But she still hasn't lost that cute "word that sounds nothing like the word" thing. "Nee nuhs" is fruit snacks. Which also sounds like her word for donuts! So it's often a guessing game, but she's not afraid to tell you what she wants! Her obsession with babies has gotten even more intense. She wants to bring them everywhere. The car, the store, church, and into the bed. Everywhere. She's sitting in my lap and feeding her baby a bottle as I write this. I cannot wait to see her as a big sister.
Thomas is a busy, busy man. As a manager he has a lot of flexibility but a lot of responsibilities. He's so good about spending quality time with us when he's home. Even though I know he's exhausted, he'll make sure to spend time with the kids. Even if that means a tickle tackle with smothering kisses before bed. Or a quick video game session with Lincoln. He'll let the kids climb all over him like monkeys. It's so funny to watch. He and Lincoln usually get a little one on one time to chat when he takes him to bed.
Little dude in the womb is just kicking away! I can tell he's running out of room, but that doesn't stop him from trying to move. It's so easy to forget certain things about pregnancy. Like jumping when an elbow or a knee tickles you from the inside. Or suddenly yelping when they kick off your ribs and head butt you.
He is measuring perfectly with a slightly big belly. Which is common with Gestational Diabetes. And my fluid levels, also a common concern with GD, are perfect. My doctors have ordered 2 and 3 appointments a week. They're nervous about my preterm labor history, but I'm not concerned at all. My first two came at almost the exact same time and perfectly healthy. I'm sure this one will throw us through a loop, though! But I get lots of extra ultrasounds! Soon we'll start BPP (biophysical profile) scans to check breathing, heart function, etc. I didn't have as many appointments with my first two. It's harder with more, but I enjoy the extra peeks at our little bub.
I'm 30 weeks and can't believe we're already here. It really does feel like we just found out and like it was forever ago all at the same time. Life is flying by and the holidays coming up are just going to make it go by that much faster!
We're so excited for Thanksgiving this week. Lots of family time, good food, and love.
💕 The Grahams
One night, a few weeks ago, Thomas took the kids to bed. Abbie usually stays behind while the boys go to Lincoln's room, but this time Abbie joined them. And then it was just me. Alone. In the bed. I thought I'd love it but it was awful! I was suddenly so alone. Something I haven't felt in a very long time. Even little dude in the womb was still. And there was a deafening silence.
I fell asleep so quickly, so the feeling didn't last very long. And that part was nice!
When Thomas came back with empty arms it was so bizarre. I can't even remember the last time it was just me and Thomas alone in our bed. Probably the night my water broke with Lincoln! 🤣😜🤷♀️
I was relieved to see Abbie wander back to our room a few hours later. Barely two, in her own bed, across the house. I'm just glad she found her way back in the dark! I hadn't prepped anything like night lights in the hallways, but maybe that will be our next move.
I'm still not sure how the transition from 2 extra bed buddies to 3 will go, but I'm fully prepared for them to end up with us. But littlest dude will have his own nest safely beside the bed. I'm sure the siblings will want to smother him with love all day and night and I'm sure snuggles while they sleep would be part of that! 😳😅
These last few months have been such a strange transition for me. I'm soaking up my kids more than usual. Maybe they're changing. Maybe I'm changing. Or maybe it's the reality of this new chapter sinking in.
Lincoln is hilarious. He will run into the dark living room saying "I AM BRAVE!". He'll describe why and how something works. I often correct him, but sometimes it's fun to just listen to his little mind at work. "Mom, did you know..." And I usually don't! We ask Google a lot. 🤣 He's reading and writing and surprises me daily with little facts and tidbits and words I didn't know he knew. He pointed out the Taj Mahal and my jaw dropped. I'd like to think I could point it out, but I'm not sure! 🙈
Abbie Rae is such a spunky little thing. She's so sassy and bossy. I wonder where she got that! 😏😜 She's exploding with words and repeats everything we say. She's forming long sentences and life is so much easier when we know what she wants! But she still hasn't lost that cute "word that sounds nothing like the word" thing. "Nee nuhs" is fruit snacks. Which also sounds like her word for donuts! So it's often a guessing game, but she's not afraid to tell you what she wants! Her obsession with babies has gotten even more intense. She wants to bring them everywhere. The car, the store, church, and into the bed. Everywhere. She's sitting in my lap and feeding her baby a bottle as I write this. I cannot wait to see her as a big sister.
Thomas is a busy, busy man. As a manager he has a lot of flexibility but a lot of responsibilities. He's so good about spending quality time with us when he's home. Even though I know he's exhausted, he'll make sure to spend time with the kids. Even if that means a tickle tackle with smothering kisses before bed. Or a quick video game session with Lincoln. He'll let the kids climb all over him like monkeys. It's so funny to watch. He and Lincoln usually get a little one on one time to chat when he takes him to bed.
Little dude in the womb is just kicking away! I can tell he's running out of room, but that doesn't stop him from trying to move. It's so easy to forget certain things about pregnancy. Like jumping when an elbow or a knee tickles you from the inside. Or suddenly yelping when they kick off your ribs and head butt you.
He is measuring perfectly with a slightly big belly. Which is common with Gestational Diabetes. And my fluid levels, also a common concern with GD, are perfect. My doctors have ordered 2 and 3 appointments a week. They're nervous about my preterm labor history, but I'm not concerned at all. My first two came at almost the exact same time and perfectly healthy. I'm sure this one will throw us through a loop, though! But I get lots of extra ultrasounds! Soon we'll start BPP (biophysical profile) scans to check breathing, heart function, etc. I didn't have as many appointments with my first two. It's harder with more, but I enjoy the extra peeks at our little bub.
I'm 30 weeks and can't believe we're already here. It really does feel like we just found out and like it was forever ago all at the same time. Life is flying by and the holidays coming up are just going to make it go by that much faster!
We're so excited for Thanksgiving this week. Lots of family time, good food, and love.
💕 The Grahams
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