Abigail Rae Graham

Abigail Rae Graham

October 3rd, 2017

3:22 PM

6 pounds 15 ounces

19 ¼ inches

Thomas, Lincoln and I are so happy to introduce our newest little one.

Meet Abigail Rae Graham.

On September 18th, Baby Girl gave us a bit of a scare. I'd been contracting for weeks, but I knew it wasn't the real deal. They were usually sporadic and easily ignored.

On the 17th I was awakened by a few contractions. When they didn't subside I timed them for a half hour . 2 minutes apart almost exactly and lasting a minute. That was a little scary at 33/34 weeks. They weren't painful by any means, but sometimes timing is all you need.

I finally caved at 3am and told Thomas I was going to shower and that this may be the real deal, but probably not. I told him to go back to sleep (ha!). I heard noises so I peeked out of the shower and a fully clothed Thomas walked past. Oops!

I gave it more time and then called the nurse line. I really didn't want to go in, but because I was so early they strongly recommended it.

We got to the hospital around 5am. Contractions on the monitors were 2-5 minutes apart but still not painful. I was only dilated to a 1.5-2 centimeters. They wanted to see if I'd progress at all within a couple hours. I was still at a 2 by 7am so they gave me the option to stay or go. I never wanted to go in the first place, so I was so happy to leave! Baby Girl needed much more time and I felt bad for Thomas and Lincoln. They were dragged there and lost sleep over my silly "contractions". Thomas still had to go to work and Lincoln had to function the next day. Well, as much as a toddler has to. But I still had to mom as well!

We ended up getting home around 8am and Lincoln and I slept in until 11am, so that was really nice! Thankfully I'd stopped watching children in my home just a few days before, so we got lucky! Thomas was a trooper and went to work.

We had also taken our maternity pictures the DAY before, so that was also lucky just in case it was the real deal!

I had a doctors appointment about a week later and I was still at a 2. It was great news. I was still in the scary preemie weeks. Even though I was super uncomfortable, I'd rather ME be in pain than watch my baby through glass while she struggled.

Contractions were still hanging around but still nothing significant. I joke that I need to be in screaming pain to go into the hospital. When I told my doctor that's how I felt, her eyes got wide and she said "NO YOU DON'T!" And later you'll see why that is in fact not true. I'm very stubborn and never want to cause any unnecessary frenzy or  alarm. But I probably should have at one point!

After that fiasco I called my mom and told her we should probably change her flight. She was due to fly in on October 2nd (and baby came on the 3rd! ), but we pushed it back earlier to the September 22nd. Just to be safe!

We did lots of shopping, baking, walking, cooking, walking, errands, etc. Lots of walking! It helped my gestational diabetes and helped baby girl get into a good position. I could tell by the "lightning crotch" I'd get as I walked everywhere. I'd gasp and bend forward with the shock of the pain sometimes. The best was when strangers all stopped and stared. There was no hiding WHY I was in pain and their faces were priceless. Most looked curious and like they were possibly trying to help, but some looked scared and the rest turned on one heel and ran the other direction. I don't blame them!

My mom and I stayed busy and time flew by. On October 2nd at around 8 pm I suddenly had a strong contraction. And then another. And another. I timed them and they were EXACTLY 3 minutes apart. I was in tears. But again, stubborn Jenny refused to go in. A bath typically helped them subside, but they didn't fade this time. They were still consistent but not painful, so I decided to let everyone go to bed and we'd reconvene in the morning. I had a doctors appointment the next day, so I'd just find out dilation and go from there.

Even though I fully expected to wake up in the middle of the night to race to the hospital, I'm so glad we didn't have to suffer. Dragging everyone into the cold, calling family to come grab Lincoln, etc all seemed like such a pain to do in the middle of the night.

I called to confirm my appointment time. I told them I was having contractions and she panicked and had me come in a hour early and less than an hour from when I called. My poor mom had to scramble to get ready with very little notice. But we made it!

I predicted Abbie would come the day she did for a few reasons: timing and my doctors appointment that day. My doctor mentioned stripping my membranes. She also mentioned stripping when I was pregnant with Lincoln, but I had him before we had the chance to do the sweep. And we wouldn't have time or the need this time, either!

I was 36 weeks 2 days. We got to the doctor and I wasn't contracting, but I was definitely feeling pregnant! As she walked in I got super nervous and my stomach dropped. It was like I knew it before I knew it.

Just before she examined me, I rolled my eyes and said "With my luck I'm still at a 2!" She checked me and her eyes got wide. "Were you planning on an epidural?!" I told her no. "Did you bring your hospital bag?" I said yes. She said "Well that's a good thing. Want to know what you're dilated to?! AN EIGHT! Let's go have a birthday party!"

I covered my face and panicked a little. She said she'd send me over to the hospital and follow after to come break my water and get the party started. I was in shock!

We called Thomas and drove ALL THE WAY across the street to the hospital. Parking was a joke so we parked in the ER and walked in through there. They came down with a wheelchair quickly to grab me. Lincoln sat in my lap and had a fun ride.

They got me all checked in, asked a million questions, and started my fluids in an IV. I wasn't contracting much so they decided to go ahead and break my water. This was already SO different from when my water broke at home with Lincoln.

I knew the pain and contractions would most likely pick up after they broke my water, but it didn't change much. I was still at an 8 and not progressing like they would have liked, so they mentioned Pitocin. I'm not anti Pit, but I would love it if we didn't have to. Contractions started up again but I wasn't thinning as much so they decided to do the Pitocin. Whomp. But still not the worst. Yet.

I'd heard horror stories of no epi + pitocin and it was scary to think about. And boy were they right! No exaggeration, my contractions were so unreal once they started me on the Pit. They said I only got a "whiff" of pit but it felt like more!

The nurse (Debbie) had me walking and rocking back and forth to try and get baby to come down. She was nervous that baby's neck was a bit crooked (Asynclitism) and hoped walking and rocking would help her shift down and fix her positioning..

After that didn't work, she asked if I could lean over a ball in the bed to help baby's position. She said it was really difficult to do without the epidural, but I was willing to try anything. It was scary to think she was stuck and crooked and the words c-section kept flying through my mind.

Leaning over the ball lasted through half a contraction. It was a really awkward position and I was ready to pop that big yoga ball with my bare hands. Get it AWAY!

We tried rotating me on either side to coax baby into a better position. Eventually the contractions got worse and worse. Something worked because I could FEEL her moving down. Contractions were very much in the front and Debbie said I needed to feel them more in my bum.

I remember the bum contractions with Lincoln and with my 12 week loss last year, but I was too impatient. I kept saying "They're in the front and back. CHECK ME!" I begged her to check me constantly. I just wanted to get to pushing because that meant the end of my torment.

I exaggerated a bit with the bum pressure just to get her to check. Hahaha. Hey, man. Desperate times!

Soon after, the contractions made me want to push. She told me that was good news but I couldn't push yet. RUDE. My body was so angry and it was nearly impossible not to push!

At one point the contractions were so bad that I kind of checked out a bit. Almost an out of body "Welp, see ya later!" moment. My brain went to a very happy place. But not for long! I was having contractions back to back. I even yelled "This is UNREAL!" at one point. I asked Thomas to remind me to breathe. It's so easy to tense up and hold it in with contractions. It was so nice because I could hear Thomas whisper it, sometimes my mom, and even Amber, Thomas's sister. I needed that reminder.

Thomas was so helpful the whole time and I was NOT the nicest. At one point the pillow got in my way so I shoved it away. I must have looked uncomfortable (hahaha) because he asked me to tell him when I'd like the pillow back. I very emphatically grunted "GET AWAY!" In my defense, I was mid contraction and didn't want to have to think about ANYTHING else.

Thomas was so sweet and rubbed my neck and back pretty much the whole time. He pushed on my back to relieve pressure. He gave me water. He was so attentive and so helpful. Unfortunately I was kind of a jerk to him here and there when the pain was brutal. But he was perfect.

It got pretty intense at one point and I had to push before given permission. But I literally could not control it. Instinct took over. My sweet mama was close by and when I would groan and want to push, she'd softly remind me that I needed to "Go slow" to keep from tearing. Her little voice was a good reminder for me not to push too hard. I did not want to cause any extra injury. And it worked!

I was in an awkward position and on my side. The nurse asked if that was okay. I grunted "SURE!" because she was coming and I could feel her. Now. You don't want to move when you have 7 pounds of HUMAN coming out of your body.

I pushed again and they told me to relax. Hahaha. I took super short, sharp breaths to combat trying to push.

I could feel the nurse put her hand on me (and baby's head) and say very calmly and firmly "Get the doctor. NOW. Call the desk. Get her here now." H A L L E L U I J A H!

I immediately relaxed. She was going to come in and help end all the pain and give me a baby girl so soon! They slid the mirror over and I could see the baby's head crowning and the nurse holding her in. I was so good and didn't even push! Seeing it helped me so much. And it was SO COOL. Guys. I could see my baby almost here! My doctor didn't get there for what seemed like forever. I yelled "WHERE IS SHE?!" Remember I had a tiny human shooting out of me any second.

I swear I watched my doctor put on her booties, hair cap, and gloves in FREAKING SLOW MOTION. She lost MAJOR cool points with those shenanigans.

She didn't like me on my side so they rolled me over. At this point I was just so happy to be at this point. Thomas had my right leg and my sweet mama had my left. Amber was the photographer! I won't scare you with those photos, but I'm so glad I have them! There's really nothing like it.

One push and her head was completely out. That was amazing to see. Then I bore down, let out an Amazonian gutteral war cry and pushed her out with everything in me. I honestly didn't know I had it in me to yell like that. But it was very effective!

And she was here! They plopped her on my chest in all her gunky glory. I just remember saying "Oh, baby!" She was purple for quite a bit, but nothing too concerning. She fussed immediately and it was perfect. She'd just been through a lot!

They let me do skin to skin for an hour before checking vitals, height, weight, etc. It was so nice. I didn't get to do that with Lincoln because of slight complications.

She

nursed like a champion for 20 minutes. The nurses knew I nursed Lincoln for 2 years and kept calling me a pro, but it's SO different starting with a newborn again.